Sunday 20 August 2017

I’m a woman. Not a sexual object



                     "I’m a woman. Not a sexual object".



We all might have at one time or the other bought an object for our use. And it is possible that we don’t even notice, pay attention or appreciate the colour and the beauty of that particular object no matter how attractive it seems. All we are concerned with or interested in is its ability to serve the purpose for which it was acquired. All our focus is on that singular reason we bought it, and that alone it must serve.

Sexual objectification according to Wikipedia,is the act of treating a person as a mere instrument of sexual pleasure. Objectification more broadly means treating a person as a commodity or an object without regard to their personality or dignity. Objectification is most commonly examined at the level of a society, but can also refer to the behavior of individuals.

Female sexual objectification by a male involves a woman being viewed primarily as an object of male sexual desire, rather than as a whole person.

That is exactly the case with women. That an average male sees a woman as a sexual object isn’t new. It is a reality. Haven’t you witnessed a scenario where a lady walks past or come into an environment and the first thing that crossed the mind of the men, if not all of them though, but a generous number of them is how to get her into an enclosed place and feed himself with what is underneath her clothing in order to satisfy the hunger created in him by his orientation that when you see a woman, you see sex.

That an average man sees a woman as a sexual object is not unknown. It is a reality. That is well known and understood by many, but most of us still don’t know or pretend not to know that there is something called self-objectification. Yes, there is a concept like that. It is simply the idea of women viewing, carrying, and presenting themselves as sexual objects to the male folk. In other words, it projects a situation where women accept being viewed as sex objects.

From time to time, women’s perception of themselves as sex objects had exposed them to quite a number of societal and social ridicule. They live their lives on the principle of ‘use what you have to get what you want’. Now tell me if the private parts are the only things that such women have.
Our society has succeeded in raising a generation of women with a very low self-esteem and to see ourselves through the lens of men as sex objects for man’s pleasure and ego boost. We have unconsciously raised and still raising a generation of women that is not capable of self-love, self-dignity and self-acceptance.

And what do we say about musicians in this present day that the lyrics of a song not infused with words and sentences that depict a woman as a sexual object or instrument for their sexual satisfaction wouldn’t come out as a hit track? Derogatory words and indecent language that I feel so ashamed to mention, all pointing to women as a means for men to getting sexual satisfaction are all they sing about.

Movie makers, producers, actors and actresses are also not left out in this social menace. And the females themselves, while acting even do more than their male counterparts in projecting themselves as sexual objects. I am not surprised that virtually all the screen goddesses have bleached their skin beyond repair because they have been brainwashed that being fair complexioned sells better.

 What happened to the fact that black is beautiful. The concept of ‘Beautiful’ should be ‘BeYouTiful’ rather than ‘BeThemTiful’. Be beautiful for you, yourself and yourself alone. Not for some societal beliefs or a group of people.

The advertisers are even worse. Any product, whether it has anything to do with the skin, women, sex or not, is advertised using in most cases, an indecently dressed lady. Tell me, what has a naked or half -naked woman as
the case may be got to do with the advertisement of an estate, a car or men’s shoes. I don’t know if you have come across an advertisement where a men’s suit is being advertised and the male model used is fully kitted but the supporting female is almost naked? Isn’t that madness?

Research has it that the modern female is being subjected to negative effects associated with self-objectification- such as body shame, appearance anxiety, depression, eating disorder, bleaching, and a host of others.

This abnormal trend has led us to develop an unnecessary self-consciousness, self-evaluation and the habit of monitoring how our body appears outwardly. And this habitual body and appearance monitoring, has penetrated and dealt a fatal blow on our emotional, psychological, and motivational being.

Little wonder you see women, old and young doing things that they ordinarily wouldn’t have done if there were no male folk. They do all sorts because they are craving for acceptance. Have you forgotten that you are fearfully and wonderfully created? You are a queen. And a queen doesn't struggle or begged to be accepted. Why not carry yourself in a dignified manner and see if you will not be gladly and honourably accepted. Let your beauty radiates from within and stop living fake life that is not befitting a queen.

Women are not sex objects, and it is high time they stop seeing themselves as one. Parents should also raise their girl-child to be confident, lively, full of self-love, and self-acceptance with an unshakable self-esteem who will be able to stand tall whenever and wherever she finds herself. And not like some second-class citizen who lives at the mercy of her male counterpart.
And to the males, I am human just like you are. So, when you see me, treat me as one with great values and potentials. Not some object you can use at will for your selfish satisfaction.

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